Erlebnis Bergwerk Merkers - 500 metres underground

Sitting back stage at BURGLENGENFELD, Veranstaltungszentrum.

With the miniature bottle of Jack, and no pinball this time.

A new town for us here and nice to see some people have travelled up to 250kms to be here.

Last night was fun, Munich, last time we played the Circus Krone, which is an actual circus, hence the name.

This time further out of town in an ex potato factory.

Where we heard the news of the passing of Prince, only 57 and a great talent. I saw him at the 02 London a few years back.

A very responsive crowd and some old friends were here, Bernhard and Simone.

So I went for a rare after-show drink, but paid for it the next day.
Everyone smoked in the bar, amazing how soon we forget it used to be the norm to wake up stinking of smoke.

I just dived in bed and slept, that’s the trouble with flying out early the same day as the show, takes me a while to catch up on sleep.

Upon awakening from my esteemed repose, I couldn’t find the room key anywhere. So I had to shower in the dark.

I thought when in the shower that although I tore the room to pieces looking for the key I’ll find it in an obvious place just as I leave.

And lo and behold, the last thing I packed away was this very laptop upon which I now type, and under it the room key, and the key to the electricity.

Anyway, show time, tomorrow is the big one.

‘til then I wish you a fond  hors d'oeuvres. (Groucho)

I am writing to you from 500 metres under the Earth from a disused salt mine, and certainly the most unusual of venues.

You can't really miss the venue, you can see the mine shafts for miles.

The elevators drops into  a pitch black abyss, which only takes the traveller halfway. Then a drive through the tunnels, for a mile or so, in total darkness save for the glare of the trucks headlights.

We Then turn a corner and we are in a huge cavernous opening, with stage, light and PA, and a nice backstage area. Where I now sit, enjoying a cuppa Earl Gray.

Merkers was part of Eastern Germany, before the unification. But is best known for where the Nazis stashed their gold bullion, and art treasured, during WWII.

It was discovered by the United States Army in 1945. General Dwight D. Eisenhower himself went into the mine in April 1945 to examine the find.

It’s pretty much bomb proof down here.

So if WWIII kicks off and it’s the end of the world when we get back to the surface. It is down to us to repopulate the planet.

The acoustics here are amazing, and a good team working on the show.

Tonight, just like the last time, is Sold Out.

 Unlike last time tho’ we have changed hotel, last year it was like Fawlty Towers, where the manager was so drunk he kept falling asleep as we tried to check in.

We had to wake him, and he would have forgotten who we were

It went a bit like this

‘We have a reservation.. 5 rooms’

‘smoking or none smoking?’

‘none smoking’

‘I’m sorry we do not have any smoking rooms left’

‘Its ok we don’t smoke’

‘zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Hello!!

‘yes can I help you?

‘We have a reservation – 5 rooms’

‘smoking or none zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz’

HELLO!

‘Yes can I help you’

We have a reservation!!

‘Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz’

‘Look we have a reservation for 5 rooms, none smoking, can we have the keys please’

‘Sorry we don’t have any smoking rooms left’

‘That’s ok, none smoking is fine’

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz’

He looked a bit like Basil Fawlty too.

Today is Saint Georges Day!

And sound check begins, the drums are thundering away into the distance, the gong sounds apocalyptic.

Once down here we are here for the duration, there is no nipping back to the hotel, it takes a full two hours to get the audience in, and another 2 hours to get them out.

And we will be the last to leave.

But there are bars and restaurants down here, like an underground city.

Certainly one of the most amazing venues I have performed at, and I have done a few!

Tomorrow, we fly back to the UK, and normality.

Abbey Road

Dear reader, you join us here we at Schiphol Airport patiently awaiting our return flight home after a show in Holland.

Shaun recalling to us that the last time we were here our plane was delayed, and how he selflessly went and got us free tea, and is now bitterly complaining to me that he was ‘publicly ridiculed’ for this gallant act in my blog.

AND!!!! to make matters worse, that was the one and only time I mentioned him in my blogs, well Shaun, there is only one thing worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

So here goes……

Backstage at the gig on Friday they had a pinball machine, Gilligan's Island themed, it must be old!! So Shaun, Andy and myself battled it out, once I achieved my all time top score of 16.800,000 – yes, sixteen million eight hundred thousand - I retired to the green room for a restorative, a celebratory nip of Jack .

Leaving Shaun and Andy chasing my high score, all in vain, they gave up, accepting defeat! Andy joining me for a consolatory vodka and tonic. Although Andy got his revenge at pool back at the hotel after the show, beating me 4-0. Shaun having retired to bed ages ago.

Shaun usually likes to have a small beer after a show to relax, and early to his room. We are all a good clean living band.

Thursday was interesting, spent the day in Abbey Road Studios in London, not having been there before I was keen to enter it’s hallowed halls.

Being a nice day I decided to roar up there on the newly polished Triumph. A proper mean machine, all clean and serviced for the spring.

Although the actual street sign is obscured by graffiti, Abbey Road Studio’s location is somewhat given away by the throngs of people outside taking pics through the railings, and the amount of people on the zebra crossing, although, I always thought that it isn’t in the original site, but that it was moved years ago.

Anyway it now holds a grade II listed status and is a London tourist attraction. Daily filled by people risking life and limb against the London traffic to emulate the cover of the Beatles Abbey Road album sleeve.

Abbey Road - Studio 1

A Huge room, even when talking the voice resonates.

The main studio, the history weighs down from the walls.

It began as a 9 bedroom Georgian Town House built in the 1830’s. later converted to flats.

When the building was acquired by the Gramophone Company in 1931 Sir Edward Elgar conducted there, and has been used for many of the big film scores ever since, Lord of The Rings, Star Wars, as attested by all the awards plastered over the wall space.

Oh yes,  The Beatles recorded here too, With the late, great George Martin.

Pink Floyd, The Stones, Bob Dylan, the list goes on…. you get the picture…

Today, I am here a guest of the Groove Me project, who have developed a new 3D recording process, absolutely fascinating stuff.

Steve Harley is recording 4 songs, including a version of ‘Here Comes The Sun’ a Beatles song, written by George Harrison for the Abbey Road album, recorded here in 1969.

Speaking of which, ‘Something’ also by Harrison, and featuring on the  Abbey Road album. To go off on a  tangent for a moment, last year I was in the Cadugan Hotel, just off Sloane Square, Jimmy Page was telling us that, back in the early 70’s, he heard that George Harrison, when asked if he had heard of Led Zeppelin, replied with something along the lines of ‘Oh that’s the band that can’t write a ballad’

So, in response, Jimmy wrote ‘The Rain Song’, and he even took the two opening chords of ‘Something’ by Harrison as a kind of tongue in cheek homage.

Listen  to it, it makes sense.

Anyway, I digress.

Steve Harley had his Cockney Rebel in the studio with him, fantastic musicians, all four songs  mainly recorded in one live take.

His band includes two Austrian twin sisters, Mona and Lisa. Who are very talented, they are collectively the MonaLisa Twins, and perform, among other things, at The Cavern in Liverpool, where they now live.

                                        Mona       Billy    Helenka   Lisa      Michelle

After the recording, Steve Harley and the band are then filmed, for holographic projection. So the performance can be seen anywhere in the world, without the need for the artist to be there.

It is amazing, I saw a clip of Bob Geldof performing, only he wasn’t, it was a hologram.

Don’t ask me how they do it as I haven’t a clue, but I am invited down to the studio in Hampshire next week to witness the process.

Are we witnessing the future of music performance?

The possibilities are endless, resurrecting Elvis as a hologram?

Maybe even Led Zeppelin in Concert? Maybe I’ll be out of a job soon!

Nonetheless a fascinating day, felt part of the history of the place and met some really nice people. 

                   Mike Reid, very knowledgeable bloke and a pleasure to talk with.

I couldn’t stay too late as I had a flight early Friday, but a big thanks to Steve Harley for allowing us to sit in on his session.

Got home in time to catch the end of the Liverpool game, coming back from 1-3 down to dramatically win 4-3 and through to the semi-final of the Europa League.

Liverpool were 2-0 down when I left the pub, 3-1 down when I got home, but went onto win 4-3 after I had changed into my lucky Liverpool underpants, if they go onto win the cup I expect a winners medal for my contribution.

Our show in Leiden was good, a quick flight to Amsterdam and a 20 minute drive afterwards.

We have put The Rain Song back into the set for the next few dates at least.

Good venue, an old metal works or so I am told, good sound and everyone was on good form, many people travelling to the show from all over Holland.

Particularly Amsterdam, thanks to Enrico for the normal sized bottle of Jack.

We have an interesting gig next Saturday, 500 metres underground, more on that to follow.

A La Vache

The week started off badly with a bit of a shock to the system. I went to the pub whereby i was expecting to meet some friends, only to be confronted by a face that seemed to recall, someone from some dark recess of my memory.
Then it dawned on me, 'Oh My God!......just what is my Ex's mother doing here?' I asked myself in terror.

But no, I was wrong, it not her mother at all, it was in fact the ex itself!! I only realised my mistake when she started sucking on a cigarette, a bit like Gollum.
Obviously it's true what they say about smoking having an aging effect, but I didn't know it piled the weight on too!
I felt my legs buckle as a cold chill ran down my spine, but a stiff drink sorted me out and I was soon restored to my former vigour.

She made a hasty retreat when news of my arrival spread.

Anyway, nice little trip this one, all the gigs although in three different countries are only an hour or so apart.

And a chance for me to practice my French, A La Vache!

Je Pense que Je parle Francais tres bien, I even made up a little joke about the mandolin, tres amusant!

First one up St Avold in France, we flew in early that morning and had chance to catch up with some sleep before sound check.

A few problems at sound check, but all well on the night. It is nice to have our own equipment out here, and our regular crew.

We have Peter on drums for this series of shows as Simon is still on ‘leave’.

Sadly tho’ our portable DVD player packed up, so we couldn’t display our Live at Wacken DVD.

Second show – Sankt Ingbert, Germany, and we have a new crew member, Tino, the guitar tech, very efficient, having all of Andys guitars ready for him, in the right tuning, at the right time of the set.

I usually take the opportunity to talk to the crowd between songs  to allow Andy time to tune up. I didn’t have chance to say anything as Andys guitars were all tuned and ready to go!

I’ll have to talk quicker in future.

Nice to return ‘The Song Remains the Same’ and ‘The Rain Song’ into the set.

The next day is a short drive to Luxembourg. The venue, Rockhal, is in the aptly named Avenue du Rock ‘n’ Roll.

Our hotel is opposite the venue and there are many people staying here who have travelled to be at the show.

Many from Belgium,  and some others who were at St Avold 2 days ago.

That being the case, we put a few different songs in tonight, but as we are on a strict curfew, we  can’t go too mad!

But yeah, a good little trip, , no late nights or massive partying, so no hangovers.

Early to bed,  not too much travel, short flights, nice food.

The crew did a fantastic job, the venues all marvellous, and great shows thanks to the fantastic people who came along.

Only one gripe, on our flight back, I am sure by some mix up. Pete, the drummer inexplicably flying first class whilst I am at the back of the plane!

Pete had Champagne and canapés, I got a cuppa tea and a bag of crisps! Surely some mistake!

I will be having words with the powers that be!

The Return of the Jeff

Although I have now escaped from boot camp, I still get regular updates from my fellow Gladiators.

And an important and interesting development has occurred

Jeff Stewart, yes, THE Jeff Stewart.

The very man who attended boot camp just the once, got half way up The Old Man of Coniston, only to find it was too cold and turned back.

To spend the rest of boot camp tucked up cosily in his bed.

He has come for a second outing.

Yes the same man who said on his way back down Coniston he met a very attractive woman coming the opposite way, on a track just wide enough for one person, and he didn’t know whether to toss himself off or block her passage.

The same man who strolling around the garden playing croquet, announced,  ’Once the vicar’s wife gets a firm grip on the shaft, no man’s balls are safe’

He has returned.

For those who do not know, Jeff is an English version of Frasier Crane, and in true Jeff fashion, turned up in all the wrong gear.

Lacking the proper hiking or gym wear, he came in his tennis whites, and set off on the morning walk.

Soon, however, Jeff was lagging far behind, head lolling like those toy dogs in the back of a car.

The noble Gladiators at boot camp waited gallantly in the aptly-named Brief Encounter tea house in Carnforth for  Jeff to catch up.

Whilst waiting, the troop decided to have breakfast, and of course, upholding the strict regime of boot camp, by having a Spartan Breakfast.  Not so Jeff who ordered the not so Spartan full English fry up upon arrival.

Then scrounged the bus fare back to the house.

Later that same day, whilst the rest of the bootcampers where busy in the gym, Jeff was laying in bed recovering from his morning ordeal.

Soon, the sweet aroma of the roast beef slowly cooking in the oven filled Jeff with the sudden urge to eat.

So duly he took out the beef, sliced up and tucked in, then slapped the remainder in between bits of bread to make sandwiches for his train ride home, later that day, first class of course, no doubt accompanied by a bottle of Claret.

So as Jeff wafted back to London, tucking into beef sandwiches, his fellow comrades, who had waited for him in Carnforth, found only a bone, and had vegetables for dinner that night.

Not only that – he also took a souvenir Boot Camp 2016 tee-shirt, the last one left, so Wing commander Rawlings, who led by example all week, didn’t get one.

I have said it once and I will say it again . . . Jeff, you are my hero and I can only aspire to be as great as you.