Monday, 12 June 2017

Missing planes trains and automobiles

Just how it came to pass that I missed my flight home from Tenerife is not entirely clear, well not to me anyway.

Tenerife is a volcanic island and part of the Canaries, named by the Romans due to the abundance of dogs on the island, and not canaries as is commonly assumed. Billys fact of the daaaayyyyyy. You know Latin, Canines = Canaries, obvious now isn’t it.

Now most of you should know by now that I am the most sensible of rock gods. Nice cuppa tea before hitting the stage, maybe a biscuit. Certainly no partying for Billy. Well, that isn’t entirely true anymore.Last night I slept on the floor being stepped over by fellow guests, tonight, in stark contrast is the brand new Hard Rock hotel. My room is of particular magnificence, with various gifts from the hotel generously scattered around the suite.

Somehow, I managed to break by tour bag last night, so off I trot in search of a new one, several beers later the purchase is made and there is time to enjoy the views from the Jacuzzi over the town whist enjoying a chilled glass of the complimentary champagne.

Tonight is the first event to be staged at this magnificent edifice, so we are first band to play here. Slightly later than usual start tonight as we are competing with the Champions League final, Juve v Real. Thankfully no extra time or penalties were needed so can get onstage on time. As soon as the game finishes the flood gates open and the people quickly arrive. Some even have come again after the previous nights show in the north of the island.

Ok a few minor sound problems, but finally managed to fix it, with not much help from Nobby who was spotted in the pool at sound check and in the bar during the show asking girls if they fancied a coffee in his room. 
His ols chat up line from days of yore.
But all goes well. Some of the audience to seem a trifle drunk, one bride-to-be shouting to me that it is her last night of freedom! and offered me to join her after the show for a private drink in her room, of course, I graciously declined. 
As she was very, very drunk.
Another gig another after-show party!! this time at Micky Dee’s bar, The Rock Lounge, the Motorhead and Scorpions drummer was not in attendance tonight, but a cool bar where I am unceremoniously thrust onstage with the local band for a rousing version of Immigrant Song. Beautiful setting above the beach with the moonlight shimmering off the silver sea.

This is the scene for the fates to conspire for me to miss my flight. For some unknown reason, Nobby had booked us out on an early flight, we were all hoping for some time to relax on this most beautiful of resorts, but no, our car is booked for 9.30 am.

I would like to tell you more of this exciting evening only I don’t recall much more. There are lots of pics with me and random people I do not know where they were taken. But apparently the blame mainly is on the shoulders of a Polish girl who came equipped with everything one could desire to keep the party going all night, and it did!

I did manage to get back to my bed this time, but unfortunately, didn’t do so well in getting out of it again as I slept through the alarm and missed the car and my flight home, so I am stuck here for at least another day, in paradise. Or maybe I’ll go to Barcelona for a few days? Oh well, I’ll just have to Gin and bear it! I’m off the pool. See ya.
                                          Me, myself and I

Update: luckily, the rather attractive Italian promoter named Bella I had meet at the show last night heard of my, erm…… plight? Is that the right word? My predicament maybe? Situation, that’ll do. She has saved the day, Bella is driving from the north of the island to rescue me. She has kindly arranged a room and a flight home tomorrow afternoon. A different airport, so after the plane, I’ll get the train, and collect my automobile.

As lucky happen-chance would have it, she is free tonight for dinner too!
So all's well that ends well, as they say.
I hear it is raining in the U.K. Maybe if I play my cards right I can miss this flight too.

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